My day today – summed up in three interactions, all before noon.
The Bella wanted breakfast.
Get your own goddamned breakfast. You’re 4 years old! It’s time for you to learn how to work that stove!
I cooked her breakfast: eggs, grilled cheese, vegetarian sausage.
“I wanted cereal.”
Goobie asked for her crayons and coloring book.
Get your own friggin’ crayons and coloring book. You’re 27″ – that’s plenty tall enough to get it down off of the refrigerator.
I gave her her book and crayons.
She scribbled all over the glass front door.
J. came out @ 10am.
“I thought I smelled breakfast. I waited in there for it.”
Maybe if you had come out and maybe, I dunno – taken the trash out you would have seen that I wasn’t making you breakfast. I was washing dishes, cleaning counters, and sweeping floors. While you slept in.
I cooked him breakfast: chicken & cheddar omelet.
“No jalapeños?”
Ahhh the joys.
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I totally get letting fric and frac live, they’re little.
Big man. Dude, did you pop him over the head with that skillet… or shove the jalapenos up his nose? Just curious.
F***tastic. Love it! :-)
You are such a treasure. :-)
Ouch! So, did they kinda leave you alone after that? LOL!
Wow. Give ‘em a few years. They’ll learn to tip-toe around you like my family does me. ;-)
Next time give Bella could go without breakfast, Goobie can clean that crayon off the door, and J can cook his own damn breakfast, take out the trash and sweep them floors! LOL ah if only that was the way it went, it’d be so much easier.
I think the girls should be forgiven. Hubs? Needs to have a jalepeno shoved where the son don’t shine.
I hate days like that! The worst is when I wake up in a bad mood and I know I’m in a bad mood for no particular reason but I can’t stop it! Grr.
But, I mean, it’s totally partially their fault for being aggravating. hee hee.
Yeah… I hate days like that. Did you dump his omelet into the garbage and offer him some vegan Kashi with Flax seed cereal?
I totally feel like a short order cook and waitress most of the day – *can I have more juice? I wanna colour; no not that book, the other one; where’s my Dora brush…*and hubs, he’s not a morning person either, so sauntering in at 10 AM on a weekend is so very HIM as well.
Don’t worry Maria, this phase too, shall pass. It better!!!
I don’t have the extra aggravation of a husband or partner, and when I read things like this I am actually the slightest bit happy about it! Our moring is: “Owen, I don’t know what ‘ugh ugh means, tell me.” At which point he screams. “Sam, am I in charge of your backpack?” “Hannah, it is okay if you go to the movies but I WILL be calling the parents to see if all the other kids are really going,” and last, “Eli, stop playing the fucking GameBoy and take out the trash!” I relate! :)
Yep… the 14 yo waits until I’m done cooking dinner, dishes up his plate first, sits down then asks me to bring him something to drink… At that age I CAN and DO tell him to get his own damn water. Welcome to my world. =)
I hate those days. I was like that yesterday too. Hope today is much better!
That’s gratitude for ya.
BTW, I should note that The Ambassador’s first sentence was “want pancakes”. I made him a waffle, and he refused to eat it. I do believe we are living the same life. Except you have better casting in your fantasies.
Oh isn’t that just they way it goes? Isn’t the inner dialog hysterical sometimes though.
I love the word fucktastic. That right there made my day.
AARRRRGGGHHH!!!!! Maybe you should get a punching bag and some boxing gloves and set up shop in your garage or something…
Did you kick him? I would have kicked him.
Lately I fell like the “assistant to to world.” I enable my whole family to go out and face the world-kind of like I’m my family’s support staff. I miss the days when my mom did that stuff for me!!! Such is the life of a housewife.
Your response to “no jalepenos?” Was?……
oh, you’re a much better woman than I. “no jalapeños?” I’d have hit him over the head with the frying pan.
Hope your day gets better. :)
I’m so glad I’m not the only mom hurling curses at my family behind my smiling eyes. Vodka in the orange juice helps, though.
You are much, much nicer than I am!!!
Also, you are quite a cook and you’ve made me hungry. Thanks.
:)
Ooooooh, I applaud you for not smacking him.
You are a better woman than me.
Mike would have bruises. Well, not really. But I would have yelled like you wouldn’t believe.
The kids? I can understand. The hubs? Needs a swift kick in the arse.
Sorry!
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