“are you and joey back together?
“what’s going on with you and joey?”
“what’s going to happen with you and joey?”
“how are you and joey doing?”
“what’s up with you and your boyfriend?”
Those are real questions that I’ve received over just the last week. My answer to all of these questions is this:
“None of your business.”
It may sound harsh but it’s the only answer I feel like giving. If I had it to do over, I wouldn’t have exposed my relationship with him so much. That is to say that while cardboard love would still be up and running, there would be no links on the about page to our blogs, it would be a pretty well kept secret of who the artist and the muse were. I can’t take it back though, and most of the time I don’t mind really: I’ve met some beautiful people and read some beautiful things because of it.
I understand, and I appreciate, that people are invested in our relationship, but I’d much rather they took more interest in their own love lives. It stifles my openness to know that there are people out there, reading my words, looking at my pictures, and dissecting all of it. Trying to find hidden meanings, different interpretations. It makes me want to shut everyone out and not blog about being in or out of love at all.
I think after I have everything sorted out, in my head – not necessarily meaning with he and I – that I’ll be fine writing about it all. Whatever ‘it’ is. I am a complicated person. My life, my relationships are so much more complex than anyone online knows. Hard to believe, but I don’t write about everything here. I couldn’t even if I wanted to, which I don’t.
I have a pretty good idea what the future will hold for Joey and I. But I’m not willing to prance it out for the rest of the world. Not right now at least.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Good for you. It is what it is, like you said. And it doesn’t matter what it is to anyone else. As long as you’re happy, why does anything have to be defined or explained?
October 14, 2009 at 10:02 pm
I saw your pics pop up in twitter & some tweets exchanged and after reading this post Im very glad I didn’t ask because it really wasn’t any of my business.
I would just like you to know that I send you telepathic hugs pretty much each time I think about you. You might not feel them. It’s okay. I know I send them.
October 14, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Flickr. Pics pop up on flickr.
Good.
:)
October 15, 2009 at 5:51 pm
I love you, Miss Maria! You have such depth and such a great soul. Happiness is what we all deserve. And I’m so happy for you that you have the balls to go for what you want/need. No matter what anyone tries to stick their butt in. Mwah!
You can’t blame people who love you and care for you for being interested in your life, either, though. I’m sure some people are just looking for the drama, but most just hope that you’re happy. :)
Hey, I’ve got quite a few unbloggable issues in my own life. And I am so glad that I never exposed even a tiny portion on my blogs. The need is there, for sure, but I just can’t open that can of worms for the world…
Whatever you guys are to each other, I hope you’re happy, hon.